Anybody out there?

I recently read a blog.  I love to read blogs.  This particular one generally makes my day.  It covers at least 2 of my favourite topics.  Food and babies.

This post asked a question.  It made me think.  It asked how many children you'd like to have.  Wow.  Seems a bit loaded, don't you think?  Well, maybe.  But it also suggested that the answer was more of a heart decision than a head one.  You know how 2 kids fit in a car.  It makes sense.  The author, a mom of 2, then carries on and says that she still feels like there is another baby out there.  A part of her that is still missing.

It had me analysing - how many babies would I like to have?  Who decides?  I have many girlfriends who would love more children, but their husbands disagree.  Sometimes I feel like I'd have a thousand more children, just so I can have those first magical moments with them.  I love being a mom.  I love carrying babies under my heart, as my mom says.   I love nursing.  It feels like I finally know what I want to do.  And whilst being a mom is often not enough (I absolutely have days of self-doubting pity), for now, I find myself thinking and searching for the other ones.  The ones that are still out there.

Sundays

We have a ritual.  A habit.  It's a weekend thing.  We like to go for breakfast.  And then plan our late afternoon lunch.  And, before we head home, we drive around.  Our plan is not to get our baby to sleep (thats a bonus).  We do not have extra, company paid for fuel to waste.

We drive around with the aim of refreshing our castles in the sky.  Some people have the most incredible houses on the beach.  The best view.  We pretend that these are our houses.  We see our family there.  We even build our family there.

And then we go home, watch TV, laze about.  We complain about life.  We make tea.  We plan our lives.  We get sucked into the proverbial blues.  And then we realise that we have so much to live for.  We make soup.  We watch more TV.  We feel energised.  We sleep.

And on Monday, we start to look forward to the next delicious Sunday.

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